Wednesday, February 24, 2010

BitterSweet Memories

Cash turned 8 months old today. Time really does fly with these babes.

Here are his stats:
  • 20 lbs 8 oz
  • 29 inches long
  • 90% for height and 70% for weight
Here is what's going on with him right now:
  • Cash has 7 teeth (4 on top and 3 on bottom)
  • The day after we flew home to California, Cash made his first attempts to crawl! It was so exciting. I knew he just needed carpet.
  • He can move around pretty easily from sitting to crawling to scooting
  • Loves sitting in his high chair and feeding himself finger foods

  • Says "mama" and "dadda" all the time, but not on purpose
  • Loves banging his head on the mirror, wall, and my head
  • Can pull himself up to a standing position in his crib, bath, and couch. Still a little unsteady though.
  • Drinks juice from his sippy cup
  • Starts clapping whenever I sing patty cake (or do anything he likes)
  • Getting pickier about what I feed him
  • Still makes the funniest faces. He cracks me up. He loves to mimmick the faces we make. And he still blinks on cue every time we clap, almost like he is blinking on beat.
  • Loves attention. He stares at people until they look at him and smile. Then he will grace them with a big toothy Cash smile followed by the look away. It's hilarious. He knows how cute he is. And if someone isn't smiling at him, he will look at them until they do.
  • Still super curious. He wants to know what is going on around him at all times.
It is such a pleasure to be Cash's Mom. I'm so grateful for him. Every time he is sleeping peacefully in his crib, I go in to sneak a peek at him and I say a little prayer of gratitude to my Heavenly Father. I am so fortunate to be watching over him. Such a sweet blessing and honor.

The bittersweet moment today came when I realized that it was also the 9th anniversary of my Mother's death today. She would have loved hearing about Cash and his milestones. We could have talked for hours about the funny/cute things he is doing. I would have asked her advice on everything. We would have exchanged "I love you's". And I would have said I hope I can see her soon cause Cash misses his Grandma Brown and I miss her too. That's how the conversation plays out in my head. Instead I keep her in my heart and try to think of time as Heavenly Father does. I will see her soon.

I love being a Mom. I love my Mom. I got to celebrate both of those things today. I shed some tears and I held my baby close. Somehow everything seems like it's going to be okay.


Cheltsie Spils said...

Oh Lexi. My heart is just wrenching for all of those things for you too. I have a feeling she is probably is a lot closer than you can feel or realize fully. Maybe she is doing all those things beyond the veil. If anything outrageous and amazing (like her) ever happens in your life you might know who was pulling some extra strings. Who knows she might even be Casey's third spiking hand... she always loved a good game! Love you Lex, You mean the world to me!! and you can do anything!

{P.S.} I found a cute hand embroidered mini apron that says Portugal on it you guys had sent me. I remember I adored wearing it while you guys were away. I'll have to put it on Goldie and send you a picture.

Trent and Kim said...

I love you Lex. I'm sorry I forgot to call you yesterday. I know your mom is watching you and can see Cash. I know she is proud of what a wonderful person and mother you are and that is because of her. You are so amazing and strong. I am so glad you have Cash in your life, he is such a blessing and so freaking adorable! I love you!

Linds Forrest said...

I love you!! I'm sorry you have to do this without your Mom. She was so amazing. Always so kind. I loved her smile. Your baby boy is a babe!! Welcome back to California!

Peter's Poison said...

lexi you are such an amazing woman and mother. i love you and you inspire me! cash is a little wonder man.

Amanda said...

Your mom was an amazing person. In fact, Theron and I were talking about her the other day and how what a wonderful aunt, mother, mission mom, etc. that she was. Sometimes I get so sad that my kids won't know my dad-it doesn't seem fair but I like how you mentioned Heavenly Father's time because we know someday we all sit and catch up and they will know their grandparents again.

Lindsey said...

That's a sweet post Lex. Your mom was incredible and she passed a lot of her great traits on to you. Love ya.

sherrie said...

I LOVE the new family pic at the top of your blog - you are such a cute family. I also love it when you have new pictures and updates of Cash, he is so cute and definitely resembles Casey when he was little.

Lexi, you are such a good storyteller, and as Cash (and other little Patter-people) get older, you will share so many stories of your Mother and they will actually come to know her. My Dad died when I was four, but my Mom kept him alive for me and my brother this way, and I was able to pass that on to my children, and the thing they most look forward forward to in the next life is meeting and hugging their Grandpa that they know and love. It is bittersweet, but we do the best we can.

You are such a sweet person and such a good Mom, and I'm so glad you're part of the fam.